So ... I put Adeline to bed one night this past week. As part of our going to bed ritual, I ask all the kids "what went well" during their day and "what didn't go so well". When I asked Addi what didn't go so well, she immediately said "everything". This confused me a little because she had a party at school and I was expecting Adeline to still be on a sugar high from all the fun. Maybe the girls at school were teasing her again?

As I asked a few questions and dug a little deeper into the story, apparently the reason for her awful day is that there are two boys in her class that 'like' her.

Like her.

I don't like the sound of that.

I know what 'like' meant in 1987, but I'm not so sure what it means now. Likely there has been some elementary school relationship inflation in the past 28 years. My father imagination immediately started having visions of gross little 9 year old morons trying to pinch Addi's bottom or something, but apparently all it means is that these boys are hugging her and always trying to sit next to her and giving her hearts and stuff like that. Whew! I'm more calm but I still don't care for the situation.

Having Addi star in the ballet recital was good for her confidence but apparently boys are taking notice of her as well. It's time to get some answers.

"Well, do you like either of those boys?" I ask.

"No, not at all" she answers.

"Then tell them you don't like them" I say.

"But they'll feel bad." she responds.

"Just write them a note saying 'Thanks for the attention, but I just don't like you that way.' and have your friend give it to them." I say. I solve problems for a living. This seems well within my skill set.

"Hmmm, okay." as she starts thinking about how to phrase her letter.

I say, "Look, you can write the letter in the morning. Don't worry about that now. But I want you to know something. You are a smart, athletic, funny, pretty girl. You will have idiot boys 'liking' you until you get married. You're going to have to get use to it and learn to shut it down without all this drama."

I continue, "You are more than welcome to live with me and Mommy forever. No problem with that, but eventually you may want to get married. Or become a nun. Either is fine." (At this point she makes a joke that she can bring us our coffee when we are old and can't walk. Both an endearing and frightening thought.).

"But, if any of these boys, now or later, ever bother you or make you feel uncomfortable, or they won't leave you alone after you said you don't like them back; do you know who to tell at that point?"

"The teacher." she answers.

"Wrong." I say. "You go and immediately tell your brother."

"Uhh, okay." she says.

"What is your brother's job in this life?" I ask.

"To protect me." she correctly answers.

"Correct! And if you need him to, he will go talk to those boys in the way older brothers 'talk' to stupid boys. Okay?" I ask.

"Okay." she answers. "Can I go tell him now?"

"Why don't you wait until tomorrow, after you've given them the note." I say.

"Okay." she answers.

"One last question: are there any boys you like?" I ask.

She says, "No Dad, I'm just not in that place right now."

Music to my ears. And hopefully that means I have plenty of time to enroll Henry in jujitsu! Currently, he's way too nice to be a scary "don't even look at my sister" big brother.